Ladies and gentlemen: it’s that time of month again (no, not that). The beginning of May usually means two things in a college student’s mind.

I. This is my last chance to party my ass off before I have to get a summer job.

II. How the hell is my procrastinating ass going to study for finals.

There are various methods on how to study effectively. Were going to break it down for you into the 4 different types of studiers, and the best musical remedy for those types. Leaving you plenty of time for thought # 1 above.

Exhibit A: The “Silent” Type

We will begin with the “silent type”. This elite group of studiers needs no noise. They need the utmost silence and tranquility in order to effectively get done what they need to do. They know that if there were a television, radio, or laptop in front of them, they would find themselves enthralled by those vices. Ironically enough, these fucking bastards will be damn sure to read out loud in a damn college library (sometimes while covering their ears), which negates the concept of silence completely.

Exhibit B: “The White Noise Type”

They are unbiased, undifferentiated, and non-judgmental to any type of noise. Genres of music and preferences of noise go completely out of the window when it comes to this breed of cat. As long as some type of noise is in the background, it is completely fine. The backdrop accompaniment stimulates the mind to work a little harder. Think of it as it somehow letting you know that you are still alive and your brain is not quite numb as it feels. Sources of this white noise could be a running fridge, television, random music, or whosoever is in your household at the time. Personally, if I’m in a white noise mood, listening to a natural sounds track works really well. Or you can just open your window.

Exhibit C: The Picky Bastards

Third are the “specifics”. They are the once who listen to a specific type of white noise. Genres are another term to use. Even though all of these suggestions all vary with each individual, this seems to be the general consensus with most people. Genres such as hard rock seem to motivate you better than metal. Personally; I have found the song Aqueous Transmission by Incubus (this song is considered to be soft rock) very helpful in times of stress. Rap and hip-hop, in the most general sense, has that same effect as hard rock does. I’ve never heard of someone who listens to club music or techno during studying, so I am assuming it is not effective. If you have rap instrumentals or acapellas from you favorite artists and musicians, go right ahead. Light jazz music also does wonders as well, because it creates that soothing environment. (Greatly needed during this time of year)

Exhibit D: The “Classics”

Last but not least are the “classics”. Classics are the ones who indulge into classical music. There have been tests done with lab mice and it were the ones who were exposed to classical music who finished their mazes the fastest. Classical music speeds up the processes in your brain, plus, there are no lyrics to sit there and sing along to. Anything by Mozart, Beethoven, or Bach (which is proven to be the most successful and effective) should suffice. For a more modern approach, listen to just about any movie score if you cant seem to relate to the throwback feeling of listening to classical music. The Dark Knight OST by James Newton Howard and Hans Zimmer (who also did the Pirates of the Caribbean trilogy, Lion King, Gladiator, and Simpsons Movie) is a good pick if you need a couple songs to start.