Of course there’s a lot of knowledge in universities:  the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don’t take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates.

+Abbott Lawrence Lowell

What we say: Being a senior, I can honestly say I’ve gone through 18 credits and used less than 10 sheets of paper/10 braincells to learn a damn thing.

“Successful colleges will start laying plans for a new stadium; unsuccessful ones will start hunting a new coach”

+Will Rogers

What we say: When it all comes down to it, all that matters to some colleges are sports.  Some are in small towns and the business of the community and the locals all thrive on the sports at that college.  To be quite honest, at most of these colleges, if you’re not an athlete: they don’t give that much of a shit about you.

You think about the future too much and you kinda forget about the present.

+Van Wilder

What you should take from it: If you’re on The Campus Throne, odds are that you are a college student or close to being one. You’re going to be in the best shape of your life before responsibilities start to hit you left and right. Not only that, you’ll be surrounded by tens of thousands of students just like you. Bask in it and enjoy every second. Don’t worry about missing class if it’s for a day that you’ll remember for a long time. Don’t worry about hurting your grade a little if it means you’re going to spring break.

“Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.”
+Billy Crystal

What we say: Fucking cleopatra.  I blame her for all of this madness! Women used to be slaves before she came along and gave women the power of sex.  Guys will do it anywhere, anytime, any place.  “What’s that secretary?” You want to have sex right now on the germ-infested subway bathroom toilet? I’m running there full speed now!

“In the sex war, thoughtlessness is the weapon of the male, vindictiveness of the female.”
+Cyril Connolly

What we say: This is one powerful ass mother effing quote.  Guys get back at girls by not answering the phone, or by ignoring the girl.  Girls get back at guys by decking themselves out and going out and flirting.  Bitches!

If you have a college degree you can be absolutely sure of one thing… you have a college degree.

+Author Unknown

What we say: Having a college degree was once a tremendous feat.  Nowadays, it’s a rather common one.  In fact, some of the most successful people in the world pretty much said “fuck college” and made it out without a college degree.  Just ask Steve Jobs, CEO or Apple or ask Mark Zuckerberg, the mastermind behind facebook.

“Money, it turned out, was exactly like sex, you thought of nothing else if you didn’t have it and thought of other things if you did.”
+James Arthur Baldwin

What we say:  Any quote that has the words money and sex in it is okay by us.  When it comes down to it, people only worry about things that they don’t have.  Be appreciative and grateful for what you do have, fuckos!

“If you tell folks you’re a college student, folks are so impressed. You can be a student in anything and not have to know anything. Just say toxicology or marine biokinesis, and the person you’re talking to will change the subject to himself. If this doesn’t work, mention the neural synapses of embryonic pigeons.” – Chuck Palahniuk

What we say:  You ever talk to that one kid that went to a smart college?  You tell him your a management major or undecided or some shit, and then this guy tells you how he’s curing cancer or something that your mind can’t begin to understand.  That’s what college sounds like to people who aren’t in it.  Have some fun.  Fuck with people who ask you boring ass questions like “what’s your major?”

“You have four years to be irresponsible here. Relax. Work is for people with jobs. You’ll never remember class time, but you’ll remember time you wasted hanging out with your friends. So, stay out late. Go out on a Tuesday with your friends when you have a paper due Wednesday. Spend money you don’t have. Drink ’til sunrise. The work never ends, but college does…”” +Tom Petty

What we say: This might be our favorite damn quote of all time.  Live it up, Campus Throne Army.  The world is yours.

Jocks only think about sports, nerds only think about sex.

+Lewis (Revenge of the Nerds 1984)

What we say: Damn true.  I’d say the same goes for guidos only thinking about techno, too.  Douchebags.