Can it be?  There is going to be a pill that can actually help people retain information?  Many people think this is all a hoax.  People do not believe there can be a pill that can help you memorize an abundant amount of information.  Well, some scientists would like to say otherwise.

WHAT IS PHOTOGRAPHIC MEMORY?

Photographic memory is usually defined as the capablility to recall images, objects, or sounds with accuracy, clarity, and in a great amount.  Now there are numerous techniques you can find online that can teach you how to enhance your memory.  Most people will agreee that it is easier if a pill did that for you so you do not have to work.  Well, the pill might have been created!

THE PILL

A group of Spanish scientists claim to have singled out a protein that can extend the life of visual memory significantly.  They tested this pill with mice and found out that the mice retained information for about 2 months.  Now we know there is a big difference between a human and a mouse, but this is a step in the right direction

HOW THEY DID IT

Unlike the long-term memory creation that was imaged recently, this memory extension only applies to memories made through the poorly-understood visual cortex of the brain. The scientists first removed from mice the portion of the brain believed to be associated with visual memories–layer six of the V2 region–and showed that the mice could no longer remember any object they saw. They then increased the production of a group of proteins–RGS-14–created in that cortex. The mice’s retention of visual images was increased almost 1,500 times.  WHAT THIS BASICALLY MEANS IS…. the scientists found the protein that mice are lacking to retain information and stimulated its synthesis.  Now we do not know how dangerous this is because increasing a protein in your brain may be deadly.  As we see their memory capability increased 1500 times. That is incredible!

NOW HOW WILL THIS AFFECT ME?

Do you remember all of those nights craming for that test?  Studying powerpoint slides over and over again?  Well if this pill is created and deamed safe for humans, then goodbye to the all-nighter.  This pill is going to revolutionize how students study.  People may consider this cheating, HOWEVER let us embrace the fact that a pill is going to lessen the stress for millions of college students. If you need to get somewhere, you will have to read the map once and will be able to get their with no trouble.  Difficult memory games will become obsolete.  Just imagine if you remember something one day and you could remember that one fact for over a month!!

HOWEVER, there are multiple ethical questions that are based on this.  Multiple people feel that academic requirments in school will increase because of this new medication.  People will retain more information and therefore universities are going to have higher requirments.  Additionally many people feel that the pill should be given to people who have diseases, such as Alzeimer’s Disease, because they lack normal memory ability.  People feel that recreational use should not be allowed because it would be cheating.  Overall, lets just say for now that the pill will be available for college students and we can retain all the information our professors need us to memorize.

RECOMMENDATION

This pill looks amazing.  It is going to revolutionize how everyone studies in college.  It looks like this pill is going to bring the college student less stress, better grades, and a much easier college experience.  However I do not like that they will increase the protein in the brain.  I know this is a new pill and plenty of more studies need to be done, but increasing anything in the body can be deadly.  So as of now this pill looks like a life-saver, but more tests will need to be taken.  We will keep you posted on new information about this pill.

SORRY BUT AS OF NOW YOU NEED TO KEEP STUDYING!  BUT THERE IS HELP ON THE WAY!

The Campus Throne has composed a few articles on methods to getting a term paper done. We put our own methods to the test to see exactly how long it would take to write a term paper using our methods.

An heir to the throne (Campus Throne reader) sent us an e-mail saying he was fucked because he had to write a 10-15 page paper on the negative consequences zzzzzzzzzz snore zzzzzzzz snore of globalization in a developing country. That suck ass topic may have been the most boring shit I ever heard in my life. Anyway, we put three of our interns to work and tried to see who could write his paper in the shortest amount of time.

Intern I: 2 hours 11 minutes

Intern II: 1 hour 8 minutes (Winner)

Intern III: 1 hour 31 minutes

The two losers had to wipe the winners ass for the next week. Just Kidding. Anyway, point of the story is: you can write a 10-15 term paper in about an hour if you follow our system.

1. Write out your intro and conclusion (requires actual work and thinking)
2. Paraphrase the body
3. Beef up your paper
4. Make this web-site do your bibliography because Works Cited = Bullshit

Works Cited pages suck! Right?

I mean, do teachers really think students are going to read multiple books and research several articles? They can’t even make their own powerpoints and we are supposed to do all of that for a paper? Usually, a stupid paper with a load of shit that we will never need to know again.

Anyway, bibme.org is our favorite site during finals week, when term papers are due.

What the hell is it?

Bibme.org is a site that automatically formats and creates a Works Cited page for you. They have a sweet search feature where you can type in an author, book title, or ISBN # and it outsources and formats all necessary information.

When it’s paper season, get your ass on that site and type in all of the books, articles, and literature you never even heard of read for your paper. From there, it’ll take care of the rest.

I know…I know…You’re welcome.

I know…papers blow (not like that. Although, that would be sweet).

Anyway, there really isn’t much of a way to get around your introduction and conclusion. To boost any grade, always tailor your introduction and conclusion to recite exactly what the teacher asked for in the paper.

Example: Teacher wants you to write about the suck ass negative consequences of globalization.

Your introduction and conclusion need to keep emphasizing just that:

Globalization is often viewed as one of the main driving factors for developing countries. In introducing a country to new products, industries, and channels for expansion, globalization has proven to be beneficial for a country seeking to develop their global status. However, the negative consequences of globalization are often overseen, and many critics argue that globalization often leads to growth in disease and threats to both the economy and the physical well-being of the citizens.

*Point of the story is, your introduction and conclusion are usually hidden within the assignment given to you. The body of your paper can be the royal pain in the ass. Especially, now that newer services are being offered to prevent students from plagiarizing.

What We Recommend:

Google and Wikipedia the living shit out of your topic. Then paste all of that into Microsoft Word. Don’t worry about formatting it all yet.

After you have a few pages of content, skim through it and organize it a little bit better. For example: If a page your found on google and a the Wikipedia entry both have a long except on history, have both history paragraphs together.

After you have the skeleton of your body organized, go through each sentence one at a time. Read the sentence, and then re-write it in different wording. Then go to the next sentence, read it and change the terms used with your own literature. Along the way, if any information becomes duplicated, simply delete the duplicate. For example: If a google page tells you that Japan bombed Pearl Harbor in 1941, and the Wikipedia entry says “Pearl Harbor was once bombed by Japan in 1941”, you’ll have to delete one of them to cover your tracks.

When you are finished changing the context into your own words, compare how much you have written to the length of the paper that the teacher wants. If you are short a few pages, be sure to use some tricks to beef up your paper.

After you reach the adequate length, don’t forget to write a works cited page. OR listen to us and let  this website will take care of it for you.

I know. You don’t even need to say it.  Your asshole of a professor assigned a paper that is way too long and to be quite honest, the asshole probably isn’t even going to read the damn thing.  I hate that system; therefore, may I introduce a couple of methods to beating it. (That’s what she said)

I. Eye Candy

Considering that most teachers don’t even read your entire paper, its all about the presentation.  Go on google images and search for charts and graphs related to your paper topic, and plug them into your paper.  Just be sure to throw in a sentence or two to support the image or chart you insert.  Feel free to throw in one or two relevant images and make your cover page more appealing.

II.                  Format the Font

If your teacher doesn’t specifically request Times New Roman, opt for Arial, it’s more spacious.  Don’t forget to double space.

III.                Our favorite trick. Period.

Increase the size of the periods on your paper and the length of the paper in entirety will grow substantially.  Don’t get stuck doing it one at a time, though.

• When in Microsoft Word, you hold Ctrl + f.
  
• Click the ‘replace’ tab.  For find what, simply type a period. Example: Find what: .
  
• In the Replace with section, type a period. Example: Replace with: .
  
• Right after typing the period in the ‘Replace with’ section, click “More >>”
  
• After the More>> section opens, click Format, then click Font from the Format tab.
  
• In the section where you see size, type a number from 16-20.
  
• Click OK. Then click Replace All.